The Geek’s Guide to Being Interesting

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I’m not the most comfortable person in social situations…

Dunno why. Maybe it’s that I was raised in a household with a hippy, potter (not pothead) mom and a mad professor dad. Either way, I never quite learned the standard party openers, you know, first 10 questions to ask or ways to be instantly known as the life of the party.

And, I have to admit, I kind of resented this lack of proper social grooming for a lot of years.

Because everyone I knew seemed to have a much easier time than me. But, with age, comes wisdom (also known as eccentricity), and I eventually realized my parents’ socialization skills were actually pretty killer. They were just finely tuned to the very narrow craft-world and academic communities in which they operated. Hell, my dad could throw down with the best cognitive scientists out there and my mom could talk gas-fired celadon circles around your average potter.

Problem is, outside those counterculture cliques, mainstream America operates differently.

And, while they were comfortably ensconced in their worlds, I was growing up in the bigger soup of mainstream suburban U.S.A. So, I learned how to fit into their worlds…but not mine.

And, after years of not really getting it, I started looking for the secret. I was fascinated to hear, many times and from many people, that the REAL secret is…

If you want to be interesting…be interested.

It sounded so easy. Just learn the standard openers, the 10 new-person questions, then listen to the answers and keep asking questions that demonstrate that you’ve listened and want to know more. I tried it. It took a bit of practice. But, it worked. If you pretend to be interested by mimicking the behavior of a genuinely interested person, people love you. I figured this would be a great skill set to have when looking to build clients or get a job.

Only one problem…a solid 80% of the time, I didn’t WANT to know more.

In fact, it was all I could do to keep my inner geek/hermit from raising it’s head three words into a conversation and screaming, “NEXT!”

I’m not antisocial by any definition. But, I am selectively-social.

And, here’s what I discovered. I don’t want to be considered interesting to everyone in the room, everyone at the conference or everyone at the bar. Because it takes a boatload of energy to feign interest in the name of being found interesting by people who, when it comes down to it, you don’t want to share your damn cookies with anyway. It empties you out in the name of being liked by people who, even if you’re successful in your quest to be found interesting, will have fallen not for you, but for who you’ve conned them into thinking you are.

Ya know what? Maybe, just maybe it’s time to (wo)man up and learn that it’s okay for only 5% of the people to find you interesting. Because life’s not about mass adoration, it’s about individual connection and we all have a relatively limited capacity for that.

I DO want to be considered interesting to that small subculture of people who are so genuinely likeminded and/or engaging that I authentically DO care about what they are saying. I DO want to be respected and loved and be known as a vital part of a select community, not because I asked the right questions to create just enough feigned interest to pass social muster, but because they’re them and I’m me…and that’s enough.

In the end, it’s not about how many hands I shake or the percentage of people in a room who find me interesting. It’s about the 5 people with whom there’s the chance for a genuine connection.

So, here’s a new rule about how to be the most interesting person in a room…

DON’T!

Be authentic, filters down. Have something to say, fueled by passion, to a small subset of the room who care and who you genuinely want to listen to.

Because the moment you have to feign interest, you’ve already lost the interesting game.

As always, just thinking out loud.

What do YOU think?

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54 responses

54 responses to “The Geek’s Guide to Being Interesting”

  1. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Adam Baker, Laura Ferguson. Laura Ferguson said: RT @ManVsDebt: "If you want to be interesting…be interested." http://su.pr/2wvI9i (via @jonathanfields) | this resonates right to my core. […]

  2. I am totally with you Jonathan, AND you are still left with the sticky situation of what to do when you find yourself talking to the person who makes you long for driving around NYC looking for a parking spot. I usually like to be honest but not cruel. It is a tough one!

  3. As a fellow recovering “geek”, I can relate to your point of view. I used to find myself in situations where I really did not want to hear about someone’s collection of belly-button lint (only slightly exaggerating for effect).

    What turned it around for me? I applied my “inner geek” to the “Rubic’s Cube” of interpersonal communications and treated each interaction as a puzzle to solve.

    What do I mean? Every single person I’ve ever met, if you truly engage with them, has something about them that is interesting. The challenge, for us geeks, is to figure out what it is. Usually it comes out if you can get them to talk about what they are passionate about… but asking what someone is passionate about usually gets a blank stare… hence “The Puzzle”.

    Try it next time you are at a networking meeting or cocktail party. It has worked wonders for me. If that doesn’t work, try joining Toastmasters, the public speaking organization. You will be surprised by how much easier it is to connect with people when your own communication skills are improved.

    Good luck !

    d.Mark “Dave” Wheeler

    • Jonathan Fields says:

      Hey Dave,

      Love that idea, treating each interaction as a puzzle to solve. In a reasonably small setting, I think that works well. Or, if you just decide to chunk larger settings down into smaller “sub-settings” that’d probably work, too. The challenge is mixing in scarcity of time and energy. If you’ve got 2 hours and 1,000 people in the room, 10 of whom you already know and enjoy, and life is short, how do you justify giving up a guaranteed fulfilling conversation in the name of spending a lot of time feigning interest in the name of finding the pea under the mattress?

      My communications are actually pretty good and I can command a podium or a conversation with a group of likeminded people well. So, it’s not so much about not having the skills anymore and more about the emotional investment behind when and where you bring them to life and how sincere you are when doing so.

    • velda says:

      I’ve got to agree with d.Mark “Dave” Wheeler here. I don’t often find myself in rooms with 1,000 people where the people I do know are having some sort of exclusive conversation. If there are even hundreds of people in a room, it’s easy to find all kinds of interesting conversations, and perhaps even learn something new. But then again, that’s coming from the daughter of a teacher and a chatty speech therapist. 🙂

  4. This post resonated with me. I also find myself needing to be in social situations, but having difficulty being a likable social butterfly.

    I do have a theory about it.

    I read a lot, so for me personally, listening is a test of patience because it takes much more time and energy to get the same amount of information verbally then textually. So for me, I feel like I am always waiting for the person talking to get to the point, because I am used to being able to get there so much faster when reading.

    • Jonathan Fields says:

      Chris,

      Part of it is also about how each of us are hardwired. It’s funny, I am often told that I’m perceived to be very comfortable and laid back in big social settings, but that’s really not my natural state. I’m much more comfortable and engaged in smaller settings and that seems to be supported by my Myers-Briggs type, which is INFJ, the “I” standing for introverted. Not in the classical sense of being a hermit, but that my natural tendencies are not to be the life of the party person. Where others who are naturally extroverted tend to become energized by larger and larger social settings. So, there’s a certain behavioral aspect, but some of your preferences are just plain inborn.

  5. Sami says:

    I’m working on improving my social skills and your post caused an “A-ha!” moment 🙂 I’ve had exactly the same experiences, that I’ve tried to find out more about other people only to realize that they’re a) not interesting, or b) introvert or otherwise antisocial.

    For some reason I’ve been thinking all the time that the problem is in me, in the way I ask questions or the way I present myself in these situations. I’m not saying that there’s no fault in me, but you made me realize that there might also be some fault in the person I’m talking to.

    • Jonathan Fields says:

      Hey Sami,

      Interesting, too, that you used the word “fault.” I’m guessing your using it less in a way that allocated blame and more about identifying a “problem in the circuitry.” No doubt, it’s always great to grow and learn, too.

  6. I like your thoughts here Jonathan. I went through a phase when I pretended to be interested in every person and every topic, trying to get some approval. I was the best fake active listener you can imagine 🙂

    Eventually, I change my conversational style to a directive one: I always ask questions or transition from topic to topic, trying to find something valuable and interesting for both parts. I don’t stick to a topic I don’t really care about more than 5 seconds (ok, maybe 10). And if I can’t find anything,… oh well. This is working a lot better for me and I often recommend it to my clients.

    Eduard

  7. Mike CJ says:

    Excellent! I’m totally with you on this, and as I get older, I become even less tolerant of people who don’t interest me, and therefore people in whom I don’t want to show interest.

    The problem we face as bloggers though, is that is at odds with what we’re trying to do every day – growing an audience on our various social media outposts.

    Interestingly, the more “social” and “interesting” I am on any given day here in blogland, the less I want to be in real life. Should I worry? Maybe!

  8. Charlotte says:

    The words “bland bulk” come to mind when I consider most of the people I meet. It’s ok that they’re there, but they don’t provide much social nutrition, and I find myself picking through them to get to the good bits.

    I’ve long been of the opinion that there’s no “art” of conversation. There aren’t any “tips and tricks” to help you interact with your Right People, because if someone is your Right Person you don’t need tips and tricks!

    The only “art” socially is the art of making the quick and pleasant exit. It’s unprofitable (for both you and your conversation partner) to continue a conversation which is of interest to neither of you. A pleasant “So nice to meet you. Best of luck with your venture!” can go a long way towards making networking events more pleasant for all involved.

    Easier said than done. I’m still practicing. Wax on, wax off. 🙂

  9. raisia rojas says:

    true. I was in this situation too, when I really wanted to connect with everyone. There are some people who are born with the gift to connect with all sorts of people, but not me. In the end I figured it’s much better and comfortable to be myself and be great to a few people than to force myself to act differently and not be happy.

    however, I found that one way to be genuinely interested in (and in turn, to engage) the other person is to use “you” and rarely “I” in a conversation. It just naturally directs our interest. plus people like to talk about themselves so it’s always a safe topic.

  10. Patrice says:

    Great post! People tend to get being antisocial and selective-social mixed up. There were plenty of times where I felt less than my best or seemed unapproachable because I was not comfortable in social situations. I didn’t have 10 questions to ask, and I really didn’t care about what people wanted to talk about, simply because they never showed any interest in the topics I brought. So that left me in my little corner enjoying my own company, which was not good. Basically, I tried too hard to fit in. I’ve been taking the advice you’ve given, and that was to not try to be the most interesting person in the room. So far, so good.

    Thanks!

  11. Karlil says:

    This is so true Jonathan. I tried to be interested in everyone before. It’s an awful experience. Faking my interest is so not cool. And the worst part, after some time, people tend to notice.

  12. Ivy says:

    I don’t necessarily disagree with you and would describe myself in a similar way. But then I thought of this article that I regularly return to when I’m feeling misanthropic: http://www.cracked.com/article_15231_7-reasons-21st-century-making-you-miserable.html.

  13. The only exception (where this idea isn’t a great principal) is in situations like conferences where you’re being paid to deliver a keynote.

    A lot of conference organisers have an unspoken expectation that by hiring a “personality” or “expert” to talk, they’ll be getting a bit of networking and conversational problem solving at the bar afterwards.

    Living up to this expectation is often a good business move – ensuring future gigs… but it can be a drag.

  14. I feel exactly the way you do! Sometimes I see other people fitting in with each other because they all like the same things, and I wish they liked what I like, but I never act like I like what they like if I don’t. I can watch part of a NY Giants football game if I have nothing else to do, but I really don’t care to watch every Steelers game or ANY college football game. Why don’t they care about Smallville or Superman?
    Oh well, everybody’s different, but some people are more okay with being different than others. If you wait long enough (and it’s easier with the internet) you’ll find other people interested in what you’re interested in.

  15. Naomi Niles says:

    Rock on. I’m totally with you. Never been very great about feigning interest and giving out false compliments myself. I always feel much more at home with a small group of a few friends I feel genuinely connected with than in a big group of people I hardly know.

    I think I may be slightly anti-social though, lol!

  16. I think being interested in people is in itself an art. I agree that you probably won’t find everyone interesting by just appearing interested. Rather, I think there is an art to helping people communicate about themselves on topics that ARE interesting. Everyone (yes, everyone) has SOMETHING that could be considered interesting. The trick is getting them to talk about that and not the mundane 10 questions that we’re all supposed to know.

    Obviously, interesting is in the eye of the beholder.

    I will say, I have learned some amazing things from people that I originally thought were boring before working to get them to the interesting point.

  17. Helen says:

    Interesting thoughts, but you know, there’s a lot of time where you really do have to make that small talk or else stand on your own in a corner. While having to talk about little Billy’s teething might make you want to stick needles in your eyes, that’s what’s important in that person’s life. So you listen, and wish desperately that for once one of the people at the function would have an interest in something. Anything. It’s particularly hard for women with children. Other women with children only talk about children and the PTA. It’s mind numbing.

    I’m a geek. And I can talk about anything. But I never find other geeks to talk to.

  18. Helen says:

    I wanted to add that people who really are geeks – who have an absorbing passion for at least a few non-mainstream topics – are almost invariably fascinating to talk to. I think it’s the enthusiasm and love of knowledge – you don’t have to be into the same subject to enjoy their passion.

    • Rachel says:

      Great insight Helen! People who are unashamedly passionate about a non-mainstream topic and talk about it easily usually are really interesting. Their enthusiasm and passion just pulls you in and a basic knowledge about the subject is not even necessary, though it certainly helps!

  19. Rachel says:

    You titled your post “A Geek’s Guide to Being Interesting” yet, as someone who identifies as a “geek” I don’t fit into the subset you’ve described above.

    To me, the “trick” to being interesting is to actually be interested and involved in the situation. I seek to actively listen and respond. I have never used a standard set of opening questions, yet I have the ability to make friends with almost *anyone*. What makes me different from the type described above, is that I’m usually interested in some aspect of a person and I have the ability to find that quickly. This leads to fun, interesting, deep conversations quickly. And that’s where my geeky aspect shows through…I’m always in it for the deep, insightful conversation, always trying to learn something..whether it be knowledge or insights above people in general/a particular person and how they function.

    It makes sense that my Myers-Brigg personality is ENFJ.
    This is another form of a geek–not to the stereotype of a geek as an introverted person– but an extroverted one who functions a different way in social situations.

    For people who are extroverted, aspects can be applied. Sometimes, its not necessary to go through the boring introductory questions. You just need one introductory question–such as, what is your career/job/what do you do with your time–and then follow up with an insightful question that relates to a topic you find interesting. Then there’s an easily achieved happy medium: a conversation that both parties find interesting.

    • Rachel says:

      Note: Typo critical (last paragraph) to my actual point is fixed in this version. Sorry I missed it in my re-read!

      You titled your post “A Geek’s Guide to Being Interesting” yet, as someone who identifies as a “geek” I don’t fit into the subset you’ve described above.

      To me, the “trick” to being interesting is to actually be interested and involved in the situation. I seek to actively listen and respond. I have never used a standard set of opening questions, yet I have the ability to make friends with almost *anyone*. What makes me different from the type described above, is that I’m usually interested in some aspect of a person and I have the ability to find that quickly. This leads to fun, interesting, deep conversations quickly. And that’s where my geeky aspect shows through…I’m always in it for the deep, insightful conversation, always trying to learn something..whether it be knowledge or insights above people in general/a particular person and how they function.

      It makes sense that my Myers-Brigg personality is ENFJ.
      This is another form of a geek–not to the stereotype of a geek as an introverted person–but an extroverted one who functions a different way in social situations.

      For people who are introverted, aspects of this tendency can be applied. Sometimes, it is not necessary to go through the boring introductory questions. You just need one introductory question–such as, what is your career/job/what do you do with your time–and then follow up with an insightful question that relates to a topic you find interesting. Then there’s an easily achieved happy medium: a conversation that both parties find interesting.

      • velda says:

        Rachel, I love the introverted geeks, but I am always extra glad to find people like you in any situation. :o)

        – Velda the ENf/tP

      • Havana says:

        Eloquently put, Rachel. 🙂 I am the same way. Regardless of different backgrounds, I try to (and often) find that point where the other person and I can meet– most of the time, it’s not even a shared interest, but something about him or something in their lives that makes me hungry to learn more.

        My fiance is more like Jonathan’s type. 🙂 He’s veryveryvery intelligent and has a lot of interests that you won’t find in most people, i.e. mathematics, physics, etc. and he is pretty selective of who he is interested to talking to. He even admits to getting easily bored by people, hahaha~ I’m the opposite, but whatever floats your boat. 🙂 I’m sure he’ll be glad to hear he’s not alone. I emailed this post to him.

        Jonathan, your blog post inspired me to take social interactions more lightly– or at least try. 🙂 Even though I can be extroverted, I often get unnecessarily self-conscious about socializing. I’ll loosen up! 🙂 Thanks for posting this.

  20. Jonathan Fields says:

    Loving all the comments as always, gang! I wonder how much of the difference in perspective comes from (as mentioned in an earlier comments) each of our genetic preferences toward intro/extroversion.

    If you’ve never done it before, it’d be fun if any of you would be willing to jump over to:

    http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/JTypes2.asp

    and take your Myers-Briggs Type, then come back and share it in the comments see how closely it correlates with the way you commented.

    PS – I am an INFJ, though according to the test, I’m only a moderate introvert, not a full-blown cave-dweller, lol

  21. I Say, DO …

    learn to forgive your inner geek, and even value you as a free man.

    Enjoy reading, loved this one: “Life’s not about mass adoration, it’s about individual connection”

    Lottsa Light,

  22. Helen says:

    Well said, Rachel. I’ll have to try the Myers Briggs.

    I do try to remember the ‘ask questions’ thing to draw people out, but I’m not very good at it – I do find it a challenge to get past the small talk.

    Getting back to Jonathan’s post, I think the point about being authentic is a good one – maybe there are geeks in my social network who habitually stick with the ‘safe’ topics as a safety mechanism.

    I guess the context here is more to do with business networking and ‘smoozing’. For me this kind of social contact involves making small-talk with other parents at school activities, or being seated with near-strangers at a work function.

  23. Exactly, I spoke about Authenticity in my last post

    Great post Jonathan

  24. Mick Morris says:

    Thanks Jonathon, this one hit while the iron was hot so to speak… having been reflecting on issues of relationship building as a result of a recent feedback process, and this one was great. Thanks also to the comments, so real additional pieces of gold amongst them.

    Love it..

  25. Naomi Niles says:

    Fun! I like these personality tests. Way back when, I remember taking one for a job interview. Found that really surprising although I hear that’s pretty common nowadays.

    Also INFJ and so is hubby. Strong on the introverted and intuitive parts. Probably the reason we picked our biz names with the “intuitive”, lol. Definitely in line with my above comment.

  26. J.D. Meier says:

    I agree – be authentic.

    One thing that’s worked for me is to make everyone my mentor and learn their super skill. Everybody has something they are great at. Like a kid in a candy store my goal is to learn that skill from them — and it’s always a bridge builder and win win.

  27. Tyler Hurst says:

    Not all geeks are anti-social.

  28. Farouk says:

    nice post 🙂 especially that i used to be the same when i was young!! and as i grew older i learned more about personal development and gained more social skills until i managed to get over this .

  29. eric says:

    excellent point — in fact, I think there’s an analogue here, comparing it to people that try to amass facebook and twitter followers. what’s the point of having a big number? I’d much rather have less followers/friends, and have them all be people that are really interested in what i’m up to.

    eric mueller
    flashlight worthy books

  30. Phil says:

    I’m a pretty serious geek, and I do not care for crowds. However, I’ve been told numerous times that I’m quite “charming” with other people (in small groups), even though we share little in common. My MB is INFP, with heavy (75) on the Introverted. the others were 58-N, 38-F, 17-P. So, I do seek to avoid large groups, even with like-minded people or with family.
    When I am myself, people find me interesting. When you fake it, people instinctively know (don’t you?) so I just be myself, and leave it up to the others to walk away if I bore them. 🙂

  31. Sue says:

    I did the Myers-Briggs test years ago and I’m an INFP. My understanding of the introversion/extroversion trait is that it relates to how you are energized and “recharge your batteries” rather than how socially shy/reserved or outgoing you are.

    Over the years, I’ve become better at doing the “small talk”–although I sometimes think that “shallow talk” would better describe the content of such conversations–but I’m happier in smaller groups of people who feel like kindred spirits. I find I’m not really that interested in asking what people “do” for a living: I would rather ask about their hobbies and passions and why they find those activities/interests so compelling as it’s much more interesting to watch how someone lights up and becomes very authentic when they start talking about their passions in life. By the way, many people can usually tell when someone is merely “feigning” interest in them, and I suspect it probably leaves them feeling vaguely disrespected or mocked but not quite sure why,so I’d say it’s probably better not to try and fake great interest and friendliness if it’s not there. Maybe that’s where the art of the quick and graceful exit comes in!

  32. Dear Jonathan –

    I hate large parties anyway because no one really talks about anything. Even if they are interesting, you can’t find out.

    I think you are extremely interesting.

    Stay as sweet as you are.

  33. Geoff Caras says:

    I think alot of this is world-view – instead of seeing each person as something to conquer or get something from. If you can put yourself in the “learning” place, you ALWAYS have something to learn (and something to teach). I’ve found that other approaches to just about anything helps my own approach be stronger! Learning how others percieve things is facinating and as one of the posts above becomes a complex puzzle that is facinating to most of us – and intuitive to others. Just another view!

  34. caitlyn says:

    I think you’re interesting. Stay home & write.

    ENFJ/P

  35. Ash says:

    GREAT post. You know, whenever I’m nervous talking to someone, I consciously remind myself to simply be interested in them, ask questions about them, and make them talk to me. Usually, by doing this you not only allow the conversation to evolve organically (normally you’ll end up discovering a connection you both have, or something you are able to comment on), but people really do love talking about themselves, and if you are interested in hearing about their lives, they’ll automatically love you. Learned this lesson through working in sales for years!

  36. Hugh says:

    “We were given two ears and one mouth because we’re supposed to listen twice as much as we talk.” This is one of my favorite quotes and it ties into your post quite well. Fact is, when we’re not so busy trying to remember what we want to say next, we can actually listen and LEARN a ton!

  37. Couldn’t have said it better myself!

    Also by being interested in others we learn more about them, and we thus learn more about life in general. If you find someone who is really smart about cars – ask him about cars! If you find someone who is a biologist – ask him to expand more on the interesting quirks of evolution!

    By doing this you become more intelligent and you gradually gain more and more to add to future conversations.

    So you are absolutely right! The more interested we are, the more interesting we become!

  38. Andy says:

    Following Dale Carnegie’s advice, if you can remember people names and something interesting about them you can introduce them to other people.

    > Have you met Jonathan? He’s recently discovered that he’s not a cave dweller.

  39. Hey Jonathan,
    very nicely crafted post, that resonates with me, too.
    Being selectively social is very important, and it’s important to realize that we cannot please everyone. I usually switch to trying to please those who please me too, those who I feel good with.. why would anyone want to be considered as a top friend by anyone that they don’t consider a top friend? It’s like you cannot tell a funny joke until that joke could make you laugh too. If you’re too frustrated to laugh at it, others won’t, either.
    Nice article. 😀

    Best wishes,
    Zoli

  40. Nate says:

    Jonathan –

    I’m the EXACT same way. I’m most definitely an introvert and from reading your above article, I would guess that you are as well. The thing is, like you, I’m not anti-social by any means. It’s just that I don’t need to talk to everyone and be the most interesting person in the room. I like to linger on the outskirts during a social gathering. I don’t want to be the center of attention.

    Now…get me in contact with someone who I really connect with. Someone who loves philosophy, psychology, paranormal topics, spirituality, entrepreneurship, unique ways of living (a la Thoreau),travel and I can start talking for hours.

    I always wanted to be that person who can talk to everyone and be friends with everyone, but I’m just not that person. I’m finally starting to do a better job of accepting who I am and my own unique strengths.

  41. I wanted to do an imitation of Meg Ryan in “When Harry Met Sally” when I read your post (Yes! Yes! Yes!). But people already talk about me around here 🙂

    I completely understand where you are coming from and I feel the same way. When I was younger (highs school and college), I got along with everyone. This was because I was desperate to be likable, so I would hang on every word. I considered myself a very good listener.

    But as I grew older, I realized I just wasn’t interested in what most people had to say. I realized that I spent most of my college years trying to be like my friends. Trying to act like them and learn their interests. And, while I had a lot of fun with my friends that I NEVER would have done on my own, there were things I liked to do that I never was able to, because my friends weren’t interested.

    After college, my friends drifted away, and I found myself doing things on my own. And I LOVED it! I could just decide to go to a movie at 10PM in the middle of the week. I could try out that new bar, and leave after 10 minutes if I didn’t like it. I could pick up on the weekend and drive to a different city for a Sci-Fi convention. I could do anything I wanted without needing to ask someone, or wait on someone, or come to some group consensus. I did it alone, but it was worth it, bcause I COULD DO WHAT I WANTED.

    Along the way I just sort of got out of the habit of holding conversations, and feigning interest. Dating was ok, because the possibility of sex is a great attention-focuser. Then I met my wife, who was actually interesting, so I didn’t have to fake anything there. But I never really got back into the habit of making small talk.

    These days, I have my interests. They aren’t the same as most people (no sports, not much politics, and dear god… no reality TV). I’m a pretty straight forward personality… I like to get to the point, because my attention span is so short, I’ll forget where I was going if the sentence is too long. So small talk is out.. just tell me what you want. And if your interests aren’t like mine.. that’s OK, but life is too short to spend time on you.. sorry.. that’s just the way it is.

  42. […] from our extensive coverage this week, we're extremely excited about the po… 4 Likes The Geek’s Guide to Being Interesting | Jonathan Fields I'm not the most comfortable person in social situations… Dunno why. Maybe it's that I was […]

  43. Angela says:

    I feel the same way – I’m interested in particular kinds of people and everyone else can do as they please. The problem is, though, I was so poorly socialized that I have a difficult time getting in with people I genuinely enjoy being around and find interesting. Ah, well… it will come, right?

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