Comments on: Why My 7 Year Old Can Out-negotiate Half The Lawyers In NY http://www.jonathanfields.com/blog/why-my-7-year-old-can-out-negotiate-half-the-lawyers-in-ny/ Entrepreneurship, marketing, personal devlelopment Sun, 14 Mar 2010 21:27:03 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: Craig http://www.jonathanfields.com/blog/why-my-7-year-old-can-out-negotiate-half-the-lawyers-in-ny/#comment-4306 Craig Fri, 11 Jul 2008 14:21:43 +0000 http://jonathanfields.com/blog/?p=407#comment-4306 lol I enjoyed reading this. I'm very curious about language and how it's used. Especially areas such as body language. Just currently finished reading a good called 'Definative book of body language' and a lot that was brought up in this article was mentioned :) lol I enjoyed reading this.

I’m very curious about language and how it’s used. Especially areas such as body language.

Just currently finished reading a good called ‘Definative book of body language’ and a lot that was brought up in this article was mentioned :)

]]> By: MizFit http://www.jonathanfields.com/blog/why-my-7-year-old-can-out-negotiate-half-the-lawyers-in-ny/#comment-4248 MizFit Mon, 07 Jul 2008 15:28:33 +0000 http://jonathanfields.com/blog/?p=407#comment-4248 and my 2.5 yo is well on her way. and my 2.5 yo is well on her way.

]]> By: NY Lawyer http://www.jonathanfields.com/blog/why-my-7-year-old-can-out-negotiate-half-the-lawyers-in-ny/#comment-4247 NY Lawyer Mon, 07 Jul 2008 15:28:10 +0000 http://jonathanfields.com/blog/?p=407#comment-4247 When your daughter says "ice cream got on the seat" she is actually using a very well known yet very hard to use negotiation technique, that is, never start a negotiation in a disadvantage position, even if you are in an actual disadvantage. Changing little words and using tense shifting have a huge impact at the starting point of a negotiation. This is something kids use so often and we, somehow, forget. When your daughter says “ice cream got on the seat” she is actually using a very well known yet very hard to use negotiation technique, that is, never start a negotiation in a disadvantage position, even if you are in an actual disadvantage. Changing little words and using tense shifting have a huge impact at the starting point of a negotiation. This is something kids use so often and we, somehow, forget.

]]> By: Sophie http://www.jonathanfields.com/blog/why-my-7-year-old-can-out-negotiate-half-the-lawyers-in-ny/#comment-4243 Sophie Mon, 07 Jul 2008 14:14:24 +0000 http://jonathanfields.com/blog/?p=407#comment-4243 I hadn't noticed this but after reading your article I realize that my kids do use some clever techniques to win arguments; including my 3 year-old daughter asking me a question and then immediately adds "say yes" or "say no"; what choice do I have? Do as I am told, or face an hour of crying until I finally surrender? I hadn’t noticed this but after reading your article I realize that my kids do use some clever techniques to win arguments; including my 3 year-old daughter asking me a question and then immediately adds “say yes” or “say no”; what choice do I have? Do as I am told, or face an hour of crying until I finally surrender?

]]> By: Laurie http://www.jonathanfields.com/blog/why-my-7-year-old-can-out-negotiate-half-the-lawyers-in-ny/#comment-4166 Laurie Tue, 01 Jul 2008 23:04:22 +0000 http://jonathanfields.com/blog/?p=407#comment-4166 With my five year old, uh , I mean teenager, I give two choices both of which I can live with and he chooses. I had this discussion with the college son. He was out of money and was "Starving"! I didn't want to just send him money because he has not always made the best decisions. I told him I was going to buy some food and mail it to him. He didn't want that at all. He wanted the money and he go get it himself. I then gave him the two choices, he could accept my mailed food or go without. He decided to take the food after all. HUH? Suprise? With my five year old, uh , I mean teenager, I give two choices both of which I can live with and he chooses. I had this discussion with the college son. He was out of money and was “Starving”! I didn’t want to just send him money because he has not always made the best decisions. I told him I was going to buy some food and mail it to him. He didn’t want that at all. He wanted the money and he go get it himself. I then gave him the two choices, he could accept my mailed food or go without. He decided to take the food after all. HUH? Suprise?

]]> By: Jonathan Fields http://www.jonathanfields.com/blog/why-my-7-year-old-can-out-negotiate-half-the-lawyers-in-ny/#comment-4164 Jonathan Fields Tue, 01 Jul 2008 19:53:09 +0000 http://jonathanfields.com/blog/?p=407#comment-4164 I just decided to create a new seminar for my Fall schedule... Marketing Mastery: Turning 7-Year Old Wisdom Into 7-Figures! Hahahahaha, so kidding! But, guaranteed someone's going to run with it. As always, love the comments and stories, especially the classic Star Wars debate. How come just saying the same thing louder and louder doesn' work at work, but someone how it's a sure win as a kid? ;-) I just decided to create a new seminar for my Fall schedule…

Marketing Mastery: Turning 7-Year Old Wisdom Into 7-Figures!

Hahahahaha, so kidding! But, guaranteed someone’s going to run with it.

As always, love the comments and stories, especially the classic Star Wars debate. How come just saying the same thing louder and louder doesn’ work at work, but someone how it’s a sure win as a kid? ;-)

]]> By: Chanel http://www.jonathanfields.com/blog/why-my-7-year-old-can-out-negotiate-half-the-lawyers-in-ny/#comment-4163 Chanel Tue, 01 Jul 2008 19:40:51 +0000 http://jonathanfields.com/blog/?p=407#comment-4163 I find it so fascinating that children seem to possess many "natural born" skills like this - they are easily trusting, easily loving, they see problems for what they are, etc. .. And as time goes by, life seems to wear at these skills (whether that be a good or bad thing) to help them "survive". But we can learn a lot from children. This reminds me of Matthew 18 in the bible actually, where Jesus says that we need to be "like children" (to enter the kingdom of God) and that we need to "humble ourselves" like children... While we typically view our present adult self as wiser and "better" than our childlike self, I think that there are some traits and abilities we've "downgraded" (so to speak) in the aging process. Regarding the ethical issue - I don't see anything wrong with this. In some ways it can be viewed as manipulative, but I think that as long as you are using it for genuine good (of all parties involved) and not bad, it's definitely fine. I find it so fascinating that children seem to possess many “natural born” skills like this – they are easily trusting, easily loving, they see problems for what they are, etc. .. And as time goes by, life seems to wear at these skills (whether that be a good or bad thing) to help them “survive”.

But we can learn a lot from children. This reminds me of Matthew 18 in the bible actually, where Jesus says that we need to be “like children” (to enter the kingdom of God) and that we need to “humble ourselves” like children… While we typically view our present adult self as wiser and “better” than our childlike self, I think that there are some traits and abilities we’ve “downgraded” (so to speak) in the aging process.

Regarding the ethical issue – I don’t see anything wrong with this. In some ways it can be viewed as manipulative, but I think that as long as you are using it for genuine good (of all parties involved) and not bad, it’s definitely fine.

]]> By: Justin http://www.jonathanfields.com/blog/why-my-7-year-old-can-out-negotiate-half-the-lawyers-in-ny/#comment-4159 Justin Tue, 01 Jul 2008 11:43:36 +0000 http://jonathanfields.com/blog/?p=407#comment-4159 That's really clever how you extracted so much depth from such a simple phase. But it really does make sense and is applicable. I think all humans do this, as when something negative happens, everybody wants to be as far away from the blame as possible. "The man got shot" instead of "I shot the man", heh heh. That’s really clever how you extracted so much depth from such a simple phase. But it really does make sense and is applicable. I think all humans do this, as when something negative happens, everybody wants to be as far away from the blame as possible. “The man got shot” instead of “I shot the man”, heh heh.

]]> By: Shama Hyder http://www.jonathanfields.com/blog/why-my-7-year-old-can-out-negotiate-half-the-lawyers-in-ny/#comment-4150 Shama Hyder Tue, 01 Jul 2008 00:53:50 +0000 http://jonathanfields.com/blog/?p=407#comment-4150 Seeing as how I am a marketer and hubby to be is a lawyer-our kids are going to give the best of them a run for their money. I think as marketers we already struggle with the reputation of not being straight forward, so we have an added job of taking extra responsibility. Seeing as how I am a marketer and hubby to be is a lawyer-our kids are going to give the best of them a run for their money.

I think as marketers we already struggle with the reputation of not being straight forward, so we have an added job of taking extra responsibility.

]]> By: Tim http://www.jonathanfields.com/blog/why-my-7-year-old-can-out-negotiate-half-the-lawyers-in-ny/#comment-4149 Tim Mon, 30 Jun 2008 23:32:56 +0000 http://jonathanfields.com/blog/?p=407#comment-4149 My kid just uses brute force techniques: Kid: Darth Sidious is Anakin's Dad. Dad: No son, Darth Sidious is Anakin's Teacher. Kid: Darth Sidious is Anakin's Dad. Dad: No son, Darth Sidious is Anakin's Teacher. Kid (louder): Darth Sidious is Anakin's Dad. Dad: No son, Darth Sidious is Anakin's Teacher. Kid (even louder): Darth Sidious is Anakin's Dad. Dad (quietly): Darth Sidious is Anakin's Dad. My kid just uses brute force techniques:

Kid: Darth Sidious is Anakin’s Dad.
Dad: No son, Darth Sidious is Anakin’s Teacher.
Kid: Darth Sidious is Anakin’s Dad.
Dad: No son, Darth Sidious is Anakin’s Teacher.
Kid (louder): Darth Sidious is Anakin’s Dad.
Dad: No son, Darth Sidious is Anakin’s Teacher.
Kid (even louder): Darth Sidious is Anakin’s Dad.
Dad (quietly): Darth Sidious is Anakin’s Dad.

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