Comments on: Rather Be Dead Than Disabled?

By: Karthik

Karthik — Thu, 21 Aug 2008 07:38:57 +0000

Four years ago, I met with an accident and I’ve been confined to my wheelchair since then.

Able-bodied people, to get a feel of what a disabled person might go through, imagine themselves spending a whole day in a wheelchair.

They mistake relating a day’s experience to what a disabled might go through for the rest of his life. But what they do not realize is that the most difficult part is that first day.

By: Thea

Thea — Sun, 27 Jul 2008 20:16:21 +0000

My sister had cystic fibrosis and lived with an advanced stage of it for 20 years. At one point, she was asked to participate in a survey to determine “quality of life.” Her physicians, nurses, etc, answered their own version of the survey and were stunned to find that they painted a much bleaker picture of her quality of life than she did — and she was the one going through the pain and 24/7 problems of the illness. She loved life and, despite her illness, she lived as rich a life as she could: a prolific artist, a loving volunteer, a rock-n-roll-aphile… She touched so many people’s lives. I know for a fact, she knew she’d made a difference.

By: Disabled Chat

Disabled Chat — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 14:57:02 +0000

I have Bell’s Palsy and enjoy your blog very much. First time I’ve commented, but have been reading here and there.
Great blog. I enjoy reading it every chance I get and value your opinions!

By: Kelly@SHE-POWER

Kelly@SHE-POWER — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 04:30:50 +0000

I used to have this adamant belief that I’d rather be dead than disabled or disfigured. I now tend to see this viewpoint as being based very much in the ego.

Over the years I have come to see life as a magical thing, a gift in the truest sense of the word. I would obviously find it very difficult to be disabled, especially if I was unable to communicate with people. But as a mother, I would give anything to be with my son for every day God chooses to keep me around. If that in a wheelchair or missing limbs then I guess so be it.

Finding the joy in life is really a matter of looking for it. After this depressing thoguht, I’m off to find myself some.

Kelly

By: Yoav

Yoav — Sun, 20 Jul 2008 09:02:19 +0000

Amazing Post Jonathan

In my experience the 2 things that make you want to live are:

1. Kids
2. Close encounters with death

I’ve had both and my will to live and live fully has grown tremendously.

By: James McGrane

James McGrane — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 00:09:03 +0000

This hits home for me as well. I married a woman who has MS and told me on or first date. She lives a normal as possible life, only real problem is having to use a cane or my arm when she walks. The thing is , before we even married she ended up in the hospital from complications. Everyone expected me to leave her, but I didn’t. I stayed, and I know if things get bad, I’ll keep staying and I know she’ll be here living her life to its fullest.

By: Laurie

Laurie — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 23:04:49 +0000

I think which one you choose debends on the mindset you have. Do you have a fixed mindset or a growth one? I would chhose life.

There is a 40 something year old woman in our church facing cancer surgery where the plan is to amputate her leg and part of her pelvis. Her attitude is inspiring. Yes she is mourning the change she is probably going to face but at the same time she knows God has a plan for her to live with it. She is amazing.

By: Sara at On Simplicity

Sara at On Simplicity — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 05:52:47 +0000

This isn’t something I’d given much thought to previously. Even after reading this, the question seems to hit me as more relevant to my loved ones–as in, “Would they want to live?”

And I’ll be honest, I’d be kind of insulted if they said they wouldn’t. Body parts are worth more than my love for you? Thinking of it from a loved one’s angle gives me a bit more perspective–enough to say that my answer would have to be life. Always life.

By: the communicatrix

the communicatrix — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 02:47:19 +0000

So funny. I did not even know about Disaboom until I was asked to be interviewed for it by a new friend who happens to be deaf. I have Crohn’s disease–an auto-immune disorder affecting the digestive tract–and six years after diagnosis, I don’t even think of it as a disability (except when it comes to getting health insurance. Sigh…)

It was an education getting whomped even by something as minor as Crohn’s (although my onset was pretty dramatic, according to everyone who thought I was going to die those first few weeks). Ultimately, it was the trigger that got me to start living my life fully: I totally “get” why Hawking et al would view things that way.

It’s really like that Chinese farmer parable: good luck, bad luck…who knows?

It’s a thing. What you make of it is really up to you.

By: Larry

Larry — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 01:41:30 +0000

When in the deepest bouts of pain – I want to die but I know that if I can just get past the next minute I want to live. Pain can be the invisible disability, just as destructive or just as constructive in one’s life. Pain can pass while a physical disability does not. I would not want to choose which one to have.