One of them made the deans honor roll just to see if he could do it. Why? I don’t know. Once he did it, he was over it. Could either one of them do it at any given time? Yes. How do you press the right buttons and dangle the right “carrots”? I don’t know.

My husband and I volunteered regularly (which sometimes meant being there several days a week) in their elementary school. And, we were around for all school activities throughout their school years, including all parent organizations. (Yes, in Jr. High and High School, too)

In other words, we KNEW what was going on all the time. This gives you some idea of the teaching that is going on and who their friends are. You have an idea of the teaching methods being used, too.

When parents volunteer at their kids’ schools, it would stand to reason that their teachers would have more time to spend teaching the kids and coming up with creative ways to do it. It is supposed to be their expertise that motivates kids to learn, too.

I totally suggest that you make your presence known.

I found that I had so much to say about this topic, that I had to do a post of my own:

http://jimvaleri.com/2009/09/28/learning-reasons/

Both that, and the Concrete post inspired me in so many ways. I work with a lot of kids and parents around this very issue, and I couldn’t stop thinking about it. As a behaviorist, I like the idea of extrinsic motivators, because they’re real world examples. On the other hand, you shouldn’t stifle inspiration either. So I believe there is a balance in there somewhere.

Thank you so much for this post as it gave my wife and I a really great conversation over coffee. Its especially cool to talk about when we’re talking about our future and how we want our kids to learn as well.

Cheers!

1. I’m seriously blessed to have such an incredible, thoughtful community here. Thank you guys so much for sharing your time, energy and thoughts. It’s an amazing gift!

2. This is clearly the beginning of an exploration that’s going to unfold for me and my family for quite some time.

Oh, and one more thing – I also wanted to share a conversation I had the other day with a new friend who’s a young Rabbi in NYC. BTW – while I’m a very spiritual person, I’ve never been all that drawn to organized religion.

We were talking about what type of religious or spiritual education my wife and I had considered for my daughter. To date, because we have mixed grandparents, as I’ve written about in a earlier post, we celebrate a number of different holidays.

When my new Rabbi friend started talking about Hebrew school, he said something that blew me away. In explaining how they’ve put together their curriculum and approach he said, “we pretty much looked at what every other Hebrew school is doing and did the exact opposite.” He then went on to share how he thought it was relatively tragic that most kids never return to school or temple the day after the Bar or Bat Mitzvah, because the process leading up to it is nearly universally experienced as drudgery.

I asked him why and he said that there’s a longstanding, very rigid approach to religious education (not just Judaism) that tends to lean strongly toward repetition, memorization, lack of engagement and a certain mindset by those in charge that “we had to suffer through it, now so do you.” There’s very little flexibility or integration of more modern, experiential, far more engaging strategies and approaches.

What a tragedy it is, he said, that the part of faith that is least bound by doctrine (early education curriculum and methodology) adheres most closely to outmoded, unpleasant, uninspiring approaches and practices, while the far bigger elements of daily faith which are almost always bound far more closely by doctrine, in many traditions, have been expanded and become substantially more open, engaging and dynamic.

This just didn’t make sense to him. And, as he shared his bold new approach to religious education for kids based in engagement, experience and relevance, I have to admit, I was really drawn in both by his ideas and his enthusiasm.

Just some more food for thought.

And, again, thanks so much for all the incredible comments, I’ve learned so much with this post and conversation. Feel free to to keep it going if you’ve got more to share…

Jonathan, regarding the external motivators: all the examples you gave applied to adults. I’m not saying I have the answers, but I’ve been researching this and the evidence suggests that use of external motivators in children ultimately backfires. One excellent resource is “Your Child’s Growing Mind” by Dr. Jane Healy http://www.amazon.com/Your-Childs-Growing-Mind-Development/dp/0767916158/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1253971028&sr=8-1

It’s a great book because it’s fully backed by scientific research, it’s not just her opinion. She talks in depth about how to motivate children. A couple of samples:

“Many parents and teachers make the mistake of believing that external rewards are a good way to motivate children. While stars, stickers, money for grades, and bribes (“You can have a bike if you get all A’s”) sometimes work in the short run, they have the ultimate effect of removing even more internal control from the one who needs it most- the learner.” (she has a great section on how to foster an internal “locus of control” in our children)

“Overuse of extrinsic rewards imposed by parents or teachers tends to reduce motivation in the long run. Intrinsic rewards, on the other hand, come from feelings of satisfaction in a challenge mastered and new competence gained”

Some of the tips she gives for raising motivated learners include:

-Focus on effort/learning, not grades/product
-Avoid external rewards and punishments whenever possible
-Provide carefully designed challenges,
-Encourage children to celebrate small successes
-Avoid insincere praise for poor work (definition of “poor” or “good” depends on the child’s ability in this particular situation)
-Offer choices within an overall structure
-Provide a variety of output modes (projects, art, music, dance, etc.)
-Help children see the reason (personal payoff) for completing tasks

Po Bronson and Ashley Merryman have also just come out with a book called “NurtureShock: New Thinking About Children” and here is a quote from an interview they gave to Guy Kawasaki http://www.openforum.com/idea-hub/topics/the-world/article/how-to-raise-your-kidsand-maybe-your-company-too-guy-kawasaki :

“Adults expect praise and financial rewards for their good work—bonuses are motivating. So people assume praise or prizes—even money—motivate kids, but there is no evidence that’s true. If anything, the opposite seems more true. Kids increasingly seek activities that bring immediate, tangible benefits, and doing something just for the joy of it fades away.”