Comments on: Are You Open And Deep?

By: Cathy

Cathy — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 16:35:19 +0000

I love the idea of deep conversations, getting to the soul of the other person fairly quickly. Like Rudolf, I’ve had the experience of meeting with people I’ve seemingly known all my life, and it’s great. Strong bond, memorable, etc. etc.

That said, I can totally relate to Gina’s comment. While I enjoy being asked such a question and happily give an answer, when I myself have asked “what do you care about” or questions of that ilk, I’ve generally encountered a similar reaction to Gina’s. Braver folks have even come out and told me I’m “too intense”, “too deep”, “too inappropriate”.

As I see it, it’s a hit or miss (mostly miss) proposition to bypass the social niceties (talking about the weather, etc) and jump right into something (hopefully) more meaningful.

I don’t know the extent to which regional customs, workplace mores, or even the physical appearance of the questioner plays a part.

By: Chris Brogan...

Chris Brogan... — Mon, 06 Apr 2009 11:36:29 +0000

Holy crap, you get a lot of comments around here, mister published author. Whoa.

What might not be known by evaluating my sports coat and the like is that I would dress like Marty in a heartbeat, given a different line of work. When I’m sitting across from CMOs and the like, it’d be a harder sell with awesome goggles on my head, but the thing is, I’m very spiritually close to what Marty reprsented through his choice of attire.

That said, I work hard to not be judgmental. I can be just as catty as the rest of them, but you’d find that I’m usually catty about the fancy people, not the underdogs. I love the folks like Marty who rock it. They’re real, and real outsells pretty much anything in the world.

Thanks for including me in your post. : )

By: LisaNewton

LisaNewton — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 14:09:32 +0000

Thank you for sparking a thought process. I’m been pretty sheltered from the face-to-face world, but I’m in the process of getting out there more, and this was a very timely post.

By: Joe Jacobi

Joe Jacobi — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 05:35:04 +0000

Thanks for another great post, Jonathan. We’re fortunate that we have these mediums that enable us to share our priorities before many face-to-face meetings. Ultimately, they lead to better and more interesting face-to-face meetings that help us to skip out on “what do you do” and more towards “what do you love doing?” As a dad of a little girl just a little older than yours, part of what makes this blog so interesting isn’t just the content but where your priorities are before you post.

By: Gina

Gina — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 03:39:05 +0000

Honestly? If somebody asked me what I cared about?

I’d have a difficult time not freaking out. My brain would lock up, and I’d be stunned and feel a little bit…threatened?

Insecure much?

The thing is, at the jobs I’ve had (not my own business owner yet), it’s been way uncool to get into the personal. It’s just not encouraged. And even when I’ve done it, I’ve regretted it. Layoffs, etc. just seem to make it risky to connect on that level.

Which is the flip side of why networking feels so yucky too.

It occurs to me that I need a better life.

By: Shama Hyder

Shama Hyder — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 02:31:57 +0000

Hey Jonathan-

That night was loads of fun! I have to admit-I am guilt too. I love marketing and biz- and so getting carried away with that is natural for me.

That being said, I loved hearing about how you and your wife met…and almost didn’t. That spooky voice mail you never left was something! ; )

By: kare anderson

kare anderson — Mon, 23 Mar 2009 23:38:00 +0000

Jonathan
fyi I wrote on FB about how moved i was by your post and it sparked a thread of conversation

By: Richard

Richard — Mon, 23 Mar 2009 22:45:15 +0000

Hmm. What do you do if, when you ask “what do you care about?,” you get an answer that is not in line with your values? How do you steer away from that, or disengage yourself politely?

By: Sherrie Rose (The Love Linguist)

Sherrie Rose (The Love Linguist) — Mon, 23 Mar 2009 22:43:37 +0000

Over 70 years ago a fellow name Dale wrote a book about this… How to Win Friends and Influence People. Be interested in them first (the business comes later)

Good reminder, Jonathan!

Thanks,
Sherrie Rose
The Love Linguist

By: lawain mcneil

lawain mcneil — Mon, 23 Mar 2009 22:41:30 +0000

Thanks Jonathan for the post. I had the opportunity to meet both you and Chris Brogan at SXSW. Both of you are real class guys-genuine and down to earth…I am so glad that we had the opportunity to meet and talk.